This Momentary Marriage by John Piper

John Piper always has a way of telling me something so that I cannot argue with him. And I also can't get angry with him. It's one of the reasons I love reading his books, this one included...

After being married to Noel for forty years, Piper decided to write this book. In it, he explains that the primary purpose of marriage is to showcase God's covenant-keeping love with his people, his bride, the church: "Marriage is not mainly about being or staying in love. It's mainly about telling the truth with our lives. It's about portraying something true about Jesus Christ and the way he relates to his people. It is about showing in real life the glory of the gospel. Jesus died for sinners. He forged a covenant in the white-hot heat of his suffering in our place. He made an imperfect bride his own with the price of his blood and covered her with the garments of his own righteousness. He said, "I am with you...to the end of the age...I will never leave you nor forsake you" (Matt. 28:20; Heb. 13:5). Marriage is meant by God to put that gospel reality on display in the world. That is why we are married. That is why all married people are married, even when they don't know and embrace this gospel" (26).

He then goes on to talk about forgiving and forbearing your spouse. The greatest lesson I learned here was this: "The Lord "bears with" us every day as we fall short of his will. Indeed, the distance between what Christ expects of us and what we achieve is infinitely greater than the distance between what we expect of our spouse and what he or she achieves. Christ always forgives more and endures more than we do. Forgive as you have been forgiven. Bear with as he bears with you. This holds true whether you are married to a believer or an unbeliever. Let the measure of God's grace to you in the cross of Christ be the measure of your grace to your spouse. And if you are married to a believer, you can add this: As the Lord counts you righteous in Christ, though you are not righteous in actual behavior and attitude, so count your spouse righteous in Christ, though he or she is not righteous...Marriage is meant to be a unique matrix for this display of God's grace. This is what marriage is for ultimately- the display of Christ's covenant-keeping grace" (46 - 47).

After that, Piper talks about the biblical responsibility of headship for every husband and the biblical responsibility of submission for every wife. He talks about the calling of some to a life of singleness. He talks about the divorced. He talks about the secondary purpose of marriage: to raise children to become disciples of Christ. He mostly talks about how the family of believers supersedes kinship: "Man-wife-children families are temporary blessings for this age. In the age to come, they will not exist (Matt. 22:23-30). But the church will exist as a family forever" (106).

There were no new miraculous revelations in this book, but it served as a reminder of the purpose of God in this life. The display of God's character in order to spread his saving gospel of grace is the purpose of my life. So as a teacher I am called to show my kids who God is through my job. And as a wife, I am to show God's never ending covenant with his people through my never ending covenant with my husband.

So...single, married, divorced: read it. Let it be a reminder to you too of your purpose in this life.